Looking for some magical laughs? You’re in for a spell-binding treat! Get ready to cackle with our list of the best witch puns and jokes about witchcraft. These clever quips are guaranteed to brew up some humor and leave you cackling with joy. Whether you’re a kid or just a kid at heart, these jokes are perfect for all ages. So grab your broomstick and get ready for a positively hilarious time with our witchy one-liners. No cauldron required!

Spell-Binding Humor: Our Favorite ‘Witch’ Puns & Jokes – Top Picks!

  1. Why did the witch get a job at the bakery? Because she heard they were looking for a good broom-keeper.
  2. What do you call a witch who lives in the desert? A sand-witch!
  3. Why did the witch go to the doctor? She had a spell of sickness.
  4. How did the witch pay for her new hat? She put it on her credit broom.
  5. What happens when a witch loses her temper? She gets hexed-tremely angry!
  6. What did the witch say when her broomstick broke? “I should’ve gone with a fly-by-night brand!”
  7. Why didn’t the witch enjoy her cruise? She had a spell of seasickness.
  8. How do witches stay organized? They keep all their spells in a spell-book.
  9. What is a witch’s favorite literary device? An end-of-line hex-tasy.
  10. Why do witches love to cook? They can stir up some trouble in the kitchen.
  11. How do you know when a witch is lying? Her nose grows longer, just like Pinocchio’s.
  12. What did the witch say to the werewolf on Halloween? “Fangs for being such a great friend!”
  13. Why did the witch quit her job at the haunted house? She couldn’t handle the working witching hours.
  14. What do witches use to keep their hair in place? Scare-spray.
  15. How do witches start a conversation? They use a spell-a-phone.
  16. What do you call a witch who lives in the Arctic? A blizzard witch!
  17. Why do witches make horrible chefs? They always forget to add a pinch of spook to their recipes.
  18. What did the witch say when her broom got stuck in a tree? “Looks like I’ll have to brush up on my flying skills!”
  19. How do you make a witch itch? Give her a spell itch-uation.
  20. Why did the witch visit the optometrist? She needed a new eye of newt prescription.
funny Witch jokes and one liner clever Witch puns at PunnyPeak.com

Stir Up Some Laughs with these Witchy One-Liner Jokes!

  1. Why couldn’t the witch have a baby? Her husband had a hallow-weenie.
  2. How do you fix a broken witch? With a broomstick and witch tape.
  3. Why did the witch go to therapy? She needed to work on her hex-issues.
  4. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sand-witch.
  5. Why did the witches get rid of their car? It kept witching gears.
  6. What do you get when you cross a witch with a vampire? A broody old bat.
  7. How does a witch tell time? With a witch-watch.
  8. Why did the witch refuse to ride her broomstick? It was witch-way too fast.
  9. How do you make a witch itch? Take away the W.
  10. Why did the witch join the gym? She wanted to keep her cauldron in shape.
  11. What did the witch say when she ran out of candy? “I guess I’ll just have to wing it!”
  12. Why did the witch go to the doctor? She had a bad case of hocus-pocus.
  13. How do you talk to a witch? Use a witch-perfect tone.
  14. Why did the witch get kicked out of Hogwarts? She kept casting spells in every class.
  15. How does a witch keep her hair in place? With scare spray.
  16. What do you call a group of witches playing music together? The coven-try band.
  17. Why did the witch go to therapy? She was feeling spell-doubting.
  18. What’s a witch’s favorite subject in school? Spelling.
  19. Why couldn’t the witch ride her broom? It was on a no-flying day.
  20. How do you know a witch is into interior decorating? She’s always changing her broom’s design.

Spellbinding Humor: Funny Proverbs & Wise Sayings about Witches

  1. “When in doubt, add a little more eye of newt to the cauldron.”
  2. “A true witch knows the importance of a good cackle.”
  3. “Never trust a witch with a broomstick and a bad attitude.”
  4. “A witch’s wrinkles are just her laughter lines.”
  5. “Good things come to those who curse.”
  6. “A witch’s brew is just a fancy word for soup.”
  7. “Witches don’t believe in happy endings, they prefer wicked ones.”
  8. “Broom not required, but highly recommended for dramatic effect.”
  9. “A witch without her cauldron is like a chef without her kitchen.”
  10. “Curses paid in cash, no credit accepted.”
  11. “A little bit of magic and a lot of coffee gets you through the day.”
  12. “Witchcraft is just a fancy word for multitasking.”
  13. “Flying on a broomstick isn’t as glamorous as it looks.”
  14. “A witch’s spellbook is basically her Pinterest board.”
  15. “A witch’s heart is black and full of glitter.”
  16. “Eye of newt, toe of frog, and a dash of sarcasm.”
  17. “Good witches don’t wear pointy hats, they wear yoga pants.”
  18. “Cauldrons are like slow cookers for spells.”
  19. “Don’t mess with a witch, her karma is strong.”
  20. “Hocus pocus, I need more coffee to focus.”

Trouble Brewing: QnA Jokes & Puns about Witchy Humor

  1. Q: What do you call a witch in a desert? A: A sand-witch!
  2. Q: How does a witch keep her hair in place? A: With scare-spray!
  3. Q: What kind of music do witches listen to? A: Broom and Gloom!
  4. Q: What is a witch’s favorite subject in school? A: Spelling!
  5. Q: What do you call a witch who lives on the beach? A: A sand-witch!
  6. Q: Why did the witch go on vacation? A: She wanted to get away from all the bad spells!
  7. Q: What do you call a witch who lives in the desert? A: A cactus-witch!
  8. Q: What happened when the witch went for a swim in the ocean? A: She got tide down!
  9. Q: How does a witch tell time? A: With a witch-watch!
  10. Q: What do you call a group of witches playing music? A: A broom band!
  11. Q: What do witches use to keep their skin moisturized? A: Scare-cream!
  12. Q: What do you call a cat who becomes a witch’s familiar? A: A fur-miliar!
  13. Q: What do you get when you cross a witch and a snowman? A: Frostbite!
  14. Q: Why are witches great at gardening? A: They have green thumbs!
  15. Q: How do you know if a witch is lying? A: Her nose will grow like Pinocchio’s!
  16. Q: Why did the witch go to the doctor? A: She was feeling broom-sick!
  17. Q: What do witches use to style their hair? A: A cremated-er!
  18. Q: What do you call a witch who lives in the city? A: A metro-pollution witch!
  19. Q: What is a witch’s favorite type of food? A: Spell-curry!
  20. Q: How do witches stay organized? A: They have a cauldron-tined schedule!

Witch please! Get ready to cackle with these Dad Jokes & Puns about Witchcraft

  1. Why couldn’t the witch have children? Because her husband had a hallow-weeny!
  2. Did you hear about the witch who won the spelling bee? She put a hex on the competition.
  3. I asked my dad if he knew any spells. He said, “I can make all your money disappear!”
  4. What do you call a group of witches who live together? A coven-hooven!
  5. Why did the witch go to the doctor? Because she had a spell of coughing.
  6. What did the witch’s black cat say to her on Halloween? “I got your back, witch!”
  7. What did the witch say to her disobedient broomstick? “Quit sweeping me off my feet!”
  8. Why did the witch’s potions always taste bad? She was using witch-drops instead of teardrops.
  9. How do you organize a Halloween party for a group of witches? You just have to use a broomstick!
  10. What do you get when you cross a witch with a snowman? Frostbite.
  11. What’s a witch’s favorite type of music? Witch-hop!
  12. Why did the witch refuse to wear a broomstick skirt? She thought it was too a-mop-ing!
  13. How do witches cook their food? On a cauldron over a fire-broom!
  14. What do you call a witch who lives near the South Pole? A cold-blooded broom-hilda.
  15. Did you hear about the witch who couldn’t fly? She was afraid of heights!
  16. Why were the witch’s clothes always wrinkled? She was constantly broom-ing up against things.
  17. What do you call a witch’s favorite game? Trick or treat-go-seek!
  18. How does a witch tell time? With a witch watch.
  19. What happens when a witch falls and scrapes her knee? She gets a broom-boo!
  20. What did the witch say when she tried to use her cauldron but it wasn’t working? “This is just a con-udron!”

Putting a Spell on You: Witch Double Entendres and Puns to Charm Your Senses

  1. “Why did the witch go to the doctor? She had a bad case of cauldron sores!”
  2. “What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sand-witch!”
  3. “Why did the witch refuse to ride her broom? It was swept away!”
  4. “What do you get when you cross a witch with an ice cream? A cold spell!”
  5. “Why did the witch get a job at the bakery? She heard they were short on spells!”
  6. “What do you call a witch’s hat on a pumpkin? A pumpkin patch!”
  7. “Why did the witch refuse to play cards? She was afraid of dealing with the spell-suits!”
  8. “What do you call a witch who lives in the desert? A sand-witch!”
  9. “Why did the witch get a pet snake? She heard they were great for hiss-terical companionship!”
  10. “What do you call a witch who loves to dance? A broomstick-shaker!”
  11. “Why did the witch take up knitting? She heard it was a great way to cast off!”
  12. “What do you call a witch who works at a hospital? A nurse-witch!”
  13. “Why did the witch add some spice to her potion? She wanted to add a little flavor to her magic!”
  14. “What do you call a witch who has a twin sister? A double-bubble, toil and trouble!”
  15. “Why did the witch quit her job as a postal worker? She kept delivering hex letters instead of mail!”
  16. “What do you call a witch’s favorite mode of transportation? Her ‘broom’ and board!”
  17. “Why did the witch join the gym? She wanted to cast some ‘spell’-side weights!”
  18. “What do you call a witch’s favorite holiday? ‘Hex-‘mas!”
  19. “Why did the witch always carry a thermometer? She wanted to make sure her spells were hot enough!”
  20. “What do you call a witch who loves to make pottery? A spell-caster!”

Witchy Wordplay: Recursing into Hilarious Puns about Witches

  1. Why was the witch’s broom always tired? Because it was sweep-tired-tired!
  2. Did you hear about the witch who couldn’t make a potion? She was spell-bound!
  3. What did the witch say when she saw her black cat doing magic tricks? You’ve got to be kitten me!
  4. Why did the witch’s spell malfunction? She had too many widow glitches!
  5. What did the witch say when her cauldron broke? That’s the last straw!
  6. Why did the witch go on a diet? She wanted to keep her cackle-ories in check.
  7. How does a witch organize her spells? She puts them in a spell-ving cabinet.
  8. Did you hear about the witch who couldn’t fly? She wasn’t a-plane-t enough!
  9. Why couldn’t the witch find her broomstick? It was swept away by a wave of laughter!
  10. What do you call a witch who lives in the desert? A sand-witch!
  11. How does a witch pay for her groceries? With her witching hourglass!
  12. Why did the witch cancel her flying lesson? Her instructor told her to “wing it”.
  13. What did the witch say when she turned herself into a pickle? I’m a dill-lightful witch!
  14. Why didn’t the witch’s potion work on Tuesday? It was a spell-bred day!
  15. How did the witch get rid of her hiccups? She cast a silen-curse spell.
  16. What did the witch say when her feet were sore from flying? I need some broom-rests!
  17. Why was the witch late for potions class? She got lost in her spell-book.
  18. What did the witch say when she was feeling grumpy? I’m in a fowl mood!
  19. Why did the witch give up on knitting? She kept casting-on spells by mistake.
  20. How does a witch make an excellent sandwich? She puts in a whole lot of witcher-ons!

Witch-ing you good luck: Juxtaposition jokes that’ll put a spell on you!

  1. Why was the witch invited to the cooking competition? Because she had a broomstick up her sleeve!
  2. What did the witch say when she won the lottery? It’s just a bunch of hocus pocus!
  3. Why did the witch go to the doctor? Because she had a bad case of the spells!
  4. How does a witch spell “banana”? B-A-N-A-N-A-B-O-O!
  5. What did the witch do when she ran out of eye of newt? She went to the store for some eye of kitten!
  6. Why did the witch get kicked out of the library? She wanted to check out The Necronomicon!
  7. How does a witch tell time? With a hocus-pocus clock!
  8. What do you call a witch in the desert? A sand-witch!
  9. Why did the witch get fired from her job at the bakery? She kept turning the bread into frogs!
  10. How does a witch keep her hair in place? With a spell-holding spray!
  11. What do you get when you cross a witch and a snowman? Frosty the Snow-witch!
  12. Why did the witch move to a new neighborhood? She wanted to stir up some trouble!
  13. How do you make a witch scratch her nose? Put some witch’s itch powder on it!
  14. Why did the witch refuse to watch the movie “Hocus Pocus”? She thought it was a documentary about her life!
  15. How do witches stay organized? They use spell-binding planners!
  16. What do you call a witch who lives at the beach? A sandy witch!
  17. Why did the witch win “Teacher of the Year”? She was great at spelling bees!
  18. What did the witch say when she crashed her broomstick? “Oh, broom-er!”
  19. How did the witch start her fire? She used a match made in spell heaven!
  20. Why did the witch get fired from her job as a cashier? She was always casting spells on the customers’ credit cards!

Spellbound Shenanigans: Hilarious ‘Witch’ Malapropisms

  1. Eye of Newt and Counting the Pains
  2. Bubble, Bubble, Toil and Troublemaker
  3. Toadally Wart-fueld
  4. Witchful Thinking
  5. Cauldron and Disorder
  6. Spelling Bee-leaguered
  7. Hex on the Beach
  8. Wand-ering Mind
  9. Cackle Jackal
  10. Broom-ing with Laughter
  11. Familiar Stranger
  12. Soot-tacular Performance
  13. Witched Grin
  14. Potion Control
  15. Mis-Spell-being
  16. Gone with the Broom
  17. Hocus Pocus-up
  18. Cat-atonic Behavior
  19. Spell Check-mated
  20. Wand-erlust

Witch-ing You Were Here: Hilarious Tom Swifties to Cast a Spell on Your Funny Bone

  1. “I can’t cast spells anymore,” she said begrudgingly.
  2. “I put a curse on that broomstick,” she said sweepingly.
  3. “I’ll just call my coven to help,” she said enchantingly.
  4. “I can see the future,” she said clairvoyantly.
  5. “This potion will do the trick,” she said witchfully.
  6. “I always brew my own remedies,” she said cacklingly.
  7. “I’ll just wave my wand and fix it,” she said magically.
  8. “I can make anything disappear,” she said invisibly.
  9. “I know a wicked good spell,” she said wickedly.
  10. “I always get my way,” she said hexingly.
  11. “I can turn you into a frog,” she said ribbitingly.
  12. “I’m feeling a little witchy tonight,” she said charmingly.
  13. “I’ll just cast a spell of protection,” she said incantingly.
  14. “I’ll put a spell on you,” she said bewitchedly.
  15. “I have a recipe for love potions,” she said romantically.
  16. “I can summon the dead,” she said ghostly.
  17. “I’ll just fly over there,” she said broomfully.
  18. “I have an eye for detail,” she said looking glassily.
  19. “I’m about to put on a show,” she said magically.
  20. “I’ll just float down to the party,” she said levitatingly.

Wicked Witch Spoonerisms: Spellbinding Word Play!

  1. “Stitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Stitch”
  2. “Bitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Bitch”
  3. “Switchy Mitch” instead of “Witchy Stitch”
  4. “Hitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Hitch”
  5. “Glitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Glitch”
  6. “Pitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Pitch”
  7. “Ditchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Ditch”
  8. “Fitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Fitch”
  9. “Litchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Litch”
  10. “Nitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Nitch”
  11. “Twitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Twitch”
  12. “Switchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Switch”
  13. “Snitchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Snitch”
  14. “Hootchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Hooch”
  15. “Foxy Witch” instead of “Witchy Fox”
  16. “Itchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Itch”
  17. “Punchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Punch”
  18. “Squishy Witch” instead of “Witchy Squish”
  19. “Raunchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Raun”
  20. “Slouchy Witch” instead of “Witchy Slouch”

Witch one of these knock-knock jokes will make you cackle?

  1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Witch. Witch who? Witch way to the broomstick factory?
  2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hex. Hex who? Hexcuse me, do you have any potions for a sore throat?
  3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Coven. Coven who? Coven you lend me some magic for my spell?
  4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Broom. Broom who? Broom, broom, can I get a ride on your flying machine?
  5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Potion. Potion who? Potion control says you’ve been making too many spells lately.
  6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Wizard. Wizard who? Wizard expecting some pumpkin juice for my brew.
  7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cauldron. Cauldron who? Cauldron spell my name right?
  8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Enchant. Enchant who? Enchanting to meet you, my fellow witch.
  9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bubbling. Bubbling who? Bubbling cauldron, will you pass me the eye of newt?
  10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bewitched. Bewitched who? Bewitched, bothered, and bewildered by your magical powers.
  11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Spell. Spell who? Spellbindingly beautiful is how I would describe my wand.
  12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Potion shop. Potion shop who? Potion shop where I buy all my magical supplies.
  13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Warlock. Warlock who? Warlock in the moonlight, looking for some mischief.
  14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dragon. Dragon who? Dragon-ing you into my plans for world domination.
  15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hocus. Hocus who? Hocus pocus, a spell to turn this boring day into an adventure.
  16. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Familiar. Familiar who? Familiar face, have we met at the last witch convention?
  17. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tarot. Tarot who? Tarot card reader, predicting spells of love in your future.
  18. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ghostly. Ghostly who? Ghostly apparition, can you lend me a hand with this potion?
  19. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Grimoire. Grimoire who? Grimoire and more, I need all my spell books tonight.
  20. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Warlock Holmes. Warlock Holmes who? Warlock Holmes, solving magical mysteries with my trusty broomstick sidekick.

Spell-bound laughter with these witchy puns!

Well, witches may have a reputation for being scary and powerful, but after reading through these 220+ jokes about witches, I think we can all agree they also have a wicked sense of humor! So don’t be afraid to stir up some laughter and share these jokes with your friends. And if you’re still craving more puns and jokes, be sure to check out our other posts on magical creatures like wizards, dragons, and unicorns. Who knows, you might even brew up some new favorites!

Ahmad Raza

Ahmad Raza

I’m Ahmad Raza, the pun-derful maestro behind PunnyPeak.com! As the chief architect of hilarity, I’m on a mission to spread joy, one pun at a time. Crafting jokes that tickle your funny bone is my forte, and PunnyPeak.com is the whimsical wonderland where laughter reigns supreme. Get ready for a rib-tickling adventure as we explore the crevices of humor – PunnyPeak style! Find My Best Puns.

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