Looking for some hair-larious humor to lighten up your day? You’ve come to the right place! We’ve compiled a list of the best puns about hair that are sure to make you laugh and maybe even snort a little. From clever wordplay to cheesy one-liners, these jokes will have you splitting hairs in no time. So sit back, relax, and prepare to be follicle-y entertained with our hair puns post. Trust us, it’s a cut above the rest.
Hair-Larious Humor: Our Fave Follicle Funnies – Editor’s Tress-tastic Selections!
- “I decided to start my own wig business, I’m hoping it’ll be a hair-raising success!”
- “Why did the hairdresser go on strike? They wanted better fringe benefits!”
- “I’m thinking of becoming a barber, I figure it’s a cut above the rest.”
- “Why did the ponytail go to the doctor? It was feeling a bit knotty.”
- “I’m not gonna lie, my hair has its ups and downs. It’s quite a rollercoaster.”
- “Why do bald men have trouble finding dates? They’re just too headstrong.”
- “I was going to get a haircut, but I chickened out. Now I’m a little feathered.”
- “What do you call a sheep with no hair? Baaaaaald.”
- “My hairdresser is so good, she always gives me a new outlook on life.”
- “I had to fire my hairdresser, they just didn’t make the cut.”
- “I asked my hairstylist for beach waves, but I think they misunderstood and gave me sea sickle cell.”
- “Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired.”
- “I just got my hair trimmed, you could say I’m feeling a little cropped.”
- “What did the blonde say when she saw her first gray hair? ‘This must be from all those studying sessions.'”
- “I have to wear glasses because I have tiny hair strands, otherwise it’s too hard to see them!”
- “Why did the hairdresser win an award? Because they were a cut above the rest.”
- “I tried to curl my hair, but it was a bit of a snafu. Now it’s just a frizzy mess.”
- “Why did the hair get sent to detention? It kept parting ways in class.”
- “I don’t always get haircuts, but when I do, it’s always sheer perfection.”
- “My friend told me my hair looks good today, I guess you could say we have a comb-ment.”
Hair-larious One-Liners: Comb-ing Through the Funniest Puns!
- Why was the hair salon so successful? It had shear determination.
- My hair jokes may not be the best, but they sure do grow on you.
- What do you call a sleeping hair stylist? A snore cutter.
- I’m not balding, I’m just tall enough for my scalp to get some air.
- I never understood why Rapunzel didn’t just use a ladder.
- Why was the hair stylist always late? He was always cutting it close.
- I thought about getting a mullet, but it was a bittersweet sym-hair-ony.
- Did you hear about the hairdresser who got arrested? She was lock-even.
- I wanted to make some curly fries, but my hair straightener broke.
- Why did the man only eat foods that promoted hair growth? He wanted to have a well-balanced diet.
- How do you make a blonde’s eyes sparkle? Shine a flashlight in her ear.
- What do you call a group of bald eagles? A hair club for birds.
- I don’t trust hairdressers, they’re always giving you the brush off.
- I tried to get a perm, but it was just a curling nightmare.
- What’s a mummy’s favorite hairstyle? A wrap bun.
- Why did the hairdresser refuse to work with scissors? She was worried they might cut ties.
- My hair is like a bad school picture, it’s just one bad hair day after another.
- Why did the barber only work at night? He was a nocturnal mane-teaser.
- How does a mathematician cut their hair? With logarithms.
- What do you call it when a hairdresser has a bad day? A cut-tastrophy.
Hair-Brained Humor: Q&A Jokes & Puns That’ll Make You Snicker Strands!
- Q: Why did the hairdresser win the race? A: Because he knew a shortcut!
- Q: Why was the hair feeling sad? A: Because it kept getting split ends!
- Q: What did the bald man say when he got a comb for his birthday? A: Thanks, I’ll never part with it!
- Q: What did the hairdresser say when the customer asked for a short cut? A: Sorry, but I only know how to do long cuts!
- Q: Why was the hair running late? A: Because it was stuck in a tangle!
- Q: What do you call a haircut that costs $1000? A: A shear delight!
- Q: What does a blonde and a lightbulb have in common? A: They both have light roots!
- Q: Why did the hair go to jail? A: It committed tress-passing!
- Q: What do you call a hairstyle that’s loved by both men and women? A: Hair-monious!
- Q: Why was the hair so electrifying? A: Because it had too many positive charges!
- Q: How does a hairdresser keep up with all the latest styles? A: She follows the mane trends!
- Q: What did the hair say when it was having a bad day? A: I just can’t seem to get a head!
- Q: Why did the hairdresser become a magician on the weekends? A: She wanted to pull rabbits out of hats!
- Q: What do you call a hairdresser who is also a math whiz? A: A clip-tician!
- Q: Why couldn’t the hairdresser make it to work on time? A: She had a few snags to deal with!
- Q: What’s a hair’s favorite type of music? A: Rock and bowl!
- Q: What do you call a bear with great hair? A: Furry handsome!
- Q: How do you know if your hairdresser is a superhero? A: They have the power to turn frizz into fabulous!
- Q: What did the bald man say when someone asked how he styles his hair? A: I don’t, it styles itself!
- Q: Why did the hairdresser quit her job? A: She wanted to finally let her hair down!
Hair Today, Hair Tomorrow: A Hilarious Collection of Mane Musings
- A bad hair day is just nature’s way of saying “Chill, girl. You can’t be perfect all the time.”
- Life is too short to have boring hair.
- A good hairstylist is like a magician – they can make your hair disappear!
- Remember, the higher the hair, the closer to Heaven.
- My hair is a reflection of my personality – wild and untamed.
- Call me Rapunzel because I have a lot of hair and I’m always stuck inside.
- A new hairstyle is like a new beginning, only a lot cheaper.
- Love is in the hair – I mean, air.
- People will stare, make it worth their while with fabulous hair.
- Blonde by choice, curled by the grace of God.
- You can’t buy happiness, but you can buy a good hair day, and that’s pretty much the same thing.
- I may not be perfect, but my hair is always on point.
- Haircuts are like taxes – they never look as good on us as they do in the pictures.
- If all else fails, put a bird on it and call it a hairstyle.
- My hair may not be brushed, but my confidence is always fly.
- A true friend is someone who tells you when there’s a hair in your food.
- The best things in life are free, but the second best are expensive hair treatments.
- Never trust someone who has great hair on a rainy day.
- I don’t have split ends, I have divided loyalty between my hair and my wallet.
- They say diamonds are a girl’s best friend, but I think hairspray is a close second.
Bad Hair-ditions: Hilarious Dad Jokes for Follicle-ly Challenged Dads
- What did the bald man say when he received a comb as a gift? “Thanks, but I’ll never part with it!”
- Why did the hairdresser quit her job? She was just cutting it!
- Why couldn’t the bicycle finish the race? It was two-tired!
- Did you hear about the hairstyle that was popular in the 1800s? It was called the “dreaded” look.
- What did one strand of hair say to the other? “Man, we really need to split!”
- Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired!
- How does a hairdresser cut pizza? With little ‘caesars’!
- What did the bald man say when he got a comb for Christmas? “Thanks, I’ll never part with it!”
- Why did the bald man paint rabbits on his head? Because from a distance they looked like hares!
- What do you call a bald chef? A cooking no-hair-ta.
- How do you fix a damaged hairdo? With a hairdryer!
- Why was the hairbrush late for work? It got tangled up in traffic!
- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta!
- Did you hear about the wig that opened up its own business? It was a toupe-ing company.
- What do you call a sheep with no hair? A naked lamb!
- Why did the lettuce file a complaint? It felt like it was being salad.
- How do you organize a space party? You planet.
- What did one hair say to the other before going on a rollercoaster? “Hold onto your roots, we’re in for a wild ride!”
- What do you call a bald eagle who has lost all its feathers? A balding eagle!
- How does the moon cut its hair? Solar eclipse!
Hilarious ‘Hare’ Spinsterisms: A Comical Collection of Hair Mix-Ups!
- Bairy Hush
- Lop Cop
- Razy Hair
- Leaf Shair
- Bony Hair
- Peepy Hair
- Cate Curls
- Horny Pead
- Mullet Puff
- Shiny Frizz
- Furry Locks
- Barn Bun
- Yarn Band
- Foony Cut
- Wet
Mane-ly Amusing: Hair-raising Double Entendres
- I couldn’t decide whether to have a bad hair day or a good hair day, so I settled for a ponytail.
- My hairstylist always has the best advice, she’s a cut above the rest.
- One of my biggest fears is running into someone I know when I’m having a bad hair day.
- My barber told me my hair was starting to recede, but I didn’t believe him until it was too late.
- My hair has a mind of its own, it’s always teasing me.
- I tried to brush off my bad haircut, but it just wouldn’t go away.
- I’ve heard some people have hair-trigger tempers, but my hair just won’t budge.
- I asked my stylist for a layered cut and ended up looking like an onion.
- I tried to save money by cutting my own bangs, but it was a fringe disaster.
- My hair is like a plant, it always needs a little TLC.
- My hairdresser always gives me a good scare when she brings out the scissors, but she always makes me look fabulous.
- My husband is always bugging me to put my hair up, but I prefer it down.
- I signed up for a hair styling class, but I ended up pulling the short straw.
- My hair is like a Rubik’s cube, it takes a lot of twisting and turning to make it look right.
- I can never decide if I want rose gold or blonde highlights, so I opt for both and call it rose-blond.
- My hairstylist and I have a close relationship, she’s practically my split end.
- They say blondes have more fun, but brunettes have more depth.
- I finally found the perfect shampoo, now I don’t have to lather, rinse, and repeat a million times.
- My hair is like a weather forecast, it always tells me when it’s going to rain.
- I tried to be trendy and get a bob haircut, but now I have a love-hate relationship with my hair.
Rooted in Humor: Hairlarious Recursive Puns!
- “Why did the hairdresser get into a fight? He was just trying to curl someone’s hair the wrong way.”
- “I can’t believe I got fired from the wig factory. I guess you could say I was a real bad-hair day.”
- “My friend asked me if I knew any good hairdressers. I told her I only know mediocre ones, because they’re always cutting corners.”
- “I accidentally dyed my hair blue. Guess you could say it was an impulsive decision.”
- “Why did the shampoo go to therapy? It was feeling a little washed up.”
- “I saw a man with a full head of hair on the street and couldn’t help but feel a little itchy. I guess you could say he had a real head-scratcher of a hairstyle.”
- “I knew a man who was so obsessed with his hair, he named each strand. That’s what I call hair-mony.”
- “I tried to straighten my hair, but it had other ideas. It was quite the rebellious mane-event.”
- “I asked my barber for a trim, but he gave me a buzz cut instead. Talk about a hairy situation.”
- “My hairstylist told me I needed to stop relying on heat tools and embrace my natural hair. I guess you could say she really blew my mind.”
- “I went to a hair salon that had a terrible rating, but I wanted to give them a chance. It turned out to be my worst hair-mare ever.
- “Why did the barber go to jail? He was charged with hair-assment.”
- “I accidentally swallowed some shampoo while showering. It gave me a real bubbly personality.”
- “I told my friend to just ‘brush off’ a bad hair day, but she didn’t get the comb-over.”
- “Why did the ponytail go to the bank? It wanted to make a deposit.”
- “My hair is so damaged, it needs an attorney. I should probably sue the hot tools for assault and battery.”
- “I went to a fancy hair salon and ended up with a bill bigger than my hair. That’s what I call a hairarchy.”
- “My boss told me I need to ‘clean up’ my act. I guess it’s time to shampoo and condition my behavior.”
- “I saw a bald man wearing a toupée and couldn’t help but think ‘hair today, gone tomorrow’.”
- “Why did the hairdresser go to the hospital? She needed a split endectomy.”
Hair-larious Tom Swifties: Shaking Up Styles and Puns!
- “I accidentally used too much hair gel,” Tom said dreadfully.
- “I forgot to comb my hair this morning,” Tom said ruff-lessly.
- “My new haircut is a real game-changer,” Tom said spin-edly.
- “I think I’m going bald,” Tom said bald-facedly.
- “My wife went to a fancy salon,” Tom said high-society.
- “I need a new stylist,” Tom said shear-iously.
- My ponytail completely unraveled in the wind,” Tom said tail-spinningly.
- “My barber gave me a close shave,” Tom said cuttingly.
- “My hair’s so curly, I accidentally got stuck in it,” Tom said tang-ibly.
- “I hate having to blow dry my hair every morning,” Tom said dryly.
- “I dyed my hair pink for fun,” Tom said tint-illatingly.
- “I tried a new hair product that my friend recommended,” Tom said mane-stormingly.
- “I lost my hair in a bet,” Tom said wager-ingly.
- “I accidentally cut my hair too short,” Tom said cropped-ishly.
- “My hair is so thick, it’s like a jungle up there,” Tom said follicle-delicately.
- “I can’t decide whether to get a short or long haircut,” Tom said scissor-cutally.
- “I had a bad hair day today,” Tom said coiffure-markably.
- “My shampoo smells like flowers,” Tom said rose-ingly.
- “I’m thinking of getting dreadlocks,” Tom said twist-edly.
- “I tried a new hairstyle and my friends couldn’t recognize me,” Tom said transformed-ly.
Knot Your Average ‘Hair’ Knock-knock Jokes (Knock, knock. Who’s follicle there?)
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Hairy. Hairy who? Hairy up and let me in, I need a brush for my hair!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Harry. Harry who? Harry up, I’m having a bad hair day and need your help!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Locks. Locks who? Locks great on you!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shampoo. Shampoo who? Shampoo-ne special in your hair today?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Curl. Curl who? Curl up with a good book and forget about your bad hair day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bun. Bun who? Bun these jokes are getting better already.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fringe. Fringe who? Fringe benefits of having great hair.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bangs. Bangs who? Give your hair some bang for its buck.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Extension. Extension who? Extension-cited to see you rock that new hairstyle!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Spikes. Spikes who? Spikes make everything better, even your hair.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mane. Mane who? Mane attraction for all eyes to see.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Comb. Comb who? Comb on, let’s go out and show off that fabulous hair!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Frizz. Frizz who? Frizz just won’t quit, no matter what I do!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Braid. Braid who? Braid and butter for my hair, please?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dye. Dye who? Dye-namic new look you’ve got going on there!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Tangles. Tangles who? Tangles are just nature’s way of adding character to your hair.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Scissors. Scissors who? Scissors perfect for cutting those split ends.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Haircut. Haircut who? Haircut-half of your troubles with a quick trim.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ponytail. Ponytail who? Ponytail me you’ll always be a fan of my hair.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bobby. Bobby who? Bobby pins are no match for my wild hair!
Cutting off these hair puns, for sheer fun!
Well, wasn’t that a hair-larious collection of puns and jokes about our beloved locks? I don’t know about you, but I was hair-ing my sides from laughing so much. If you’re still hungry for more hair-themed humor, be sure to check out our other pun and joke posts. Trust me, they’re a cut above the rest. Happy laughing!