95+ Friday the 13th Jokes: Puns So Bad, They’re Scary Good

Buckle up, buttercups, because it’s Friday the 13th and we’re about to get our spook on! Forget the ladders and black cats, we’re embracing the fun kind of unlucky with a mega-list of Friday the 13th puns and jokes that are guaranteed to make you LOL. Get ready for the best, most clever, and positively hilarious wordplay this side of Camp Crystal Lake. Whether your humor is a little twisted or just plain silly, we’ve got something to tickle your funny bone (without giving you a case of the bad luck). Let’s get punny!

My Picks: Top Friday The 13th Puns And Jokes

1. Why don’t they ever film Friday the 13th underwater? They’re afraid it’ll be Jason Bourne.
2. What’s Jason Voorhees’ favorite day at the library? Shhh… it’s Fry-day the 13th.
3. My horoscope said to avoid making any rash decisions this Friday the 13th… So naturally, I bought a machete. It seemed like the responsible choice.
4. What’s Jason’s favorite snack? Campfire s’mores with mini Voorhees.
5. Heard they’re making a romantic comedy about Friday the 13th… It’s a real slash-and-burn love story.
6. What do you call Jason Voorhees when he’s broke? Jason Voor-tenth.
7. Just saw a sign that said, “Camp Crystal Lake: Now Hiring!” …Seems a little sus, even for Friday the 13th.
8. What’s the scariest thing about Friday the 13th? Realizing it’s your friend’s birthday and you forgot to buy a card AGAIN.
9. Why doesn’t Jason ever use GPS? He prefers to go the machete route.
10. What’s Jason Voorhees’s favorite dance move? The Slice and Dice.
11. Why did Jason cancel his camping trip on Friday the 13th? He had a horrible case of Fry-day Night Frights.

Funniest & Best Friday The 13th Puns and Jokes

1. Why don’t cats like Friday the 13th? They prefer to stay pawsitive.
2. I’m not superstitious, but I did see a black cat cross my path on Friday the 13th… Turns out, it was just going to a job interview for a copycat position.
3. What do you call a sale on ladders on Friday the 13th? A bad step in the right direction.
4. My calendar says it’s Friday the 13th… Time to get lucky!
5. A psychic told me I’d have good luck on Friday the 13th. Now I’m just waiting to win the lottery… or at least find a parking spot.
6. What do you call a really good deal on a mirror on Friday the 13th? Reflecting on your savings.
7. Friday the 13th is just like any other day… Except everyone’s a little more jumpy when the phone rings!
8. My friend told me not to worry about Friday the 13th. He said it’s just another Fri-yay!
9. I wanted to open an umbrella indoors on Friday the 13th… But then I realized, it’s bad luck to be that superstitious.
10. I bought a lottery ticket on Friday the 13th… Worst case scenario, I’m only out a dollar and some bad luck.
11. Breaking news: Local man claims Friday the 13th is lucky for him! More on this story at 13 past the hour… if we dare.
12. Don’t worry, it’s just Friday the 13th. What’s the wurst that could happen? 🌭

Funny One-liners Friday The 13th Jokes To Ward Off Bad Luck

1. I wasn’t going to be superstitious about Friday the 13th, but then I realized it would be bad luck.
2. My calendar says it’s Friday the 13th. My anxiety says it’s a great day to overthink every decision I’ve ever made.
3. How does Jason Voorhees make his coffee? He likes it strong and deca-pitated! ☕💀
4. Just booked a flight for Friday the 13th. The airline assured me I have nothing to worry about… unless, of course, my name is Jason. ✈️😨
5. Friday the 13th is just like any other Friday, except the cats are wearing tiny hockey masks. 😹🏒
6. My black cat crossed my path this Friday the 13th. Now I’m torn between buying a lottery ticket and an armored car. 🤔🍀
7. Instead of fearing Friday the 13th, I’m embracing it! I hear it’s the one day you can wear Crocs in public without judgment. 😎🐊
8. My therapist told me to face my fears. So, I’m spending Friday the 13th at Camp Crystal Lake. Wish me luck! 😬🏕️
9. Just saw a ladder on Friday the 13th. I’m not taking any chances… climbed it twice just to be safe. 🪜🤪
10. What do you call a hockey goalie who’s scared of Friday the 13th? Easily spooked! 🥅👻
11. I used to be scared of Friday the 13th, but then I realized it’s the only day low on competition for wishing on shooting stars.🌠
12. Just remember, folks, the only bad luck on Friday the 13th is running out of pizza before you can binge-watch horror movies. 🍕🎬

Friday The 13th QnA Puns and Jokes: Prepare to Laugh (and Groan!)

1. Q: Why don’t they play poker in the woods on Friday the 13th? A: Too many cheetahs!
2. Q: What’s a ladder’s least favorite day? A: Friday the 13th – it’s bad luck to climb on broken steps!
3. Q: Why did the scarecrow win an award on Friday the 13th? A: Because he was outstanding in his field!
4. Q: What do you call a ghost who’s always forgetting things? A: A scatterbrain… especially on Friday the 13th!
5. Q: What did the calendar say to Friday the 13th? A: “You’re really creeping me out!”
6. Q: Why are fish so easy to scare on Friday the 13th? A: Because they’re always in schools!
7. Q: What kind of music do they play at a Friday the 13th party? A: Anything spooky… with a lot of “unlucky” breaks!
8. Q: What did the broom say to the dustpan on Friday the 13th? A: “Looks like it’s just us…again. Everyone else is too superstitious to come out!”
9. Q: What does a vampire always order at a restaurant on Friday the 13th? A: A bloody good steak!

Dad Jokes About Friday The 13th: Guaranteed To Make You Facepalm

1. “Why isn’t Friday the 13th scary for trees? Because they’ve got nothing to worry about…except maybe saw-turday the 14th!”
2. “I wanted to go golfing on Friday the 13th for good luck…but then I realized I’m just bad at golf.”
3. “Your mom wanted me to take down the Halloween decorations before Friday the 13th. I said, ‘Don’t worry, honey, superstition is just bad luck!'”
4. “My wife says Friday the 13th is unlucky. I said, ‘Tell that to the person who won the lottery yesterday!'”
5. “Why did the scarecrow win an award on Friday the 13th? Because he was outstanding in his field!”
6. “You know, Friday the 13th is actually a good day to stay home and relax. Less chance of anything going wrong…unless you count forgetting to take out the trash!”
7. “My lucky number is 13, so I’m always excited when Friday the 13th rolls around. It’s the only time my calendar and my bank account agree!”
8. “Why are fish so afraid of Friday the 13th? Because of all the deep-sea fishermen with hooks!”
9. “What’s the difference between Friday the 13th and a pile of dirty laundry? Eventually, the laundry gets done!”
10. “I wasn’t going to do anything for Friday the 13th this year, but then I stepped on a crack in the sidewalk. Now I HAVE to go walk under a ladder…just to be safe!”
11. “You know what they say about Friday the 13th? It’s all fun and games until someone loses an eye…of newt. Get it? Because… Halloween? I’ll see myself out.”

Friday The 13th Jokes and Puns for Kids: Guaranteed to Make You Giggle

1. Why don’t skeletons like Friday the 13th? Because it’s a scare-a-bration!
2. What do you call a witch who lives on Friday the 13th? An un-lucky charm!
3. What’s a ghost’s favorite day to ride a rollercoaster? Fri-YAY the 13th!
4. Why did the black cat cross the road on Friday the 13th? To prove it wasn’t bad luck… just a little mischievous!
5. Knock, knock! Who’s there? Friday. Friday who? Friday the 13th! Boo! Gotcha!
6. Why are vampires bad at poker? Because they always get dealt a bad hand… especially on Friday the 13th!
7. What did the monster say about Friday the 13th? “It’s just another day to me! Except I get to sleep in until noon.”
8. What’s a ghost’s favorite fruit? A boo-berry… especially on Friday the 13th!
9. Why don’t mummies go on vacation? They’re afraid they’ll relax and unwind! But on Friday the 13th, they might try it just for the scare!
10. How do you make a werewolf stew? You start on Monday and wait… By Friday the 13th, it’ll be ready… to howl about!
11. What’s a spider’s favorite day of the year? Fly-day the 13th!
12. What’s a ghost’s favorite dessert? I scream, you scream, we all scream for… BOO-berry ice cream! Even better on Friday the 13th!
13. What did the teacher say about Friday the 13th? “Now class, there’s no need to be superstitious. It’s just like any other day… except a little more boo-tiful!”

Friday The 13th Jokes and Puns for Elders: Guaranteed to Make You Laugh or Your Money Back (Just Kidding, We Don’t Have Your Money)

1. My retirement plan is basically just hoping I don’t trip over a black cat on Friday the 13th and jinx the entire stock market.
2. I wasn’t superstitious about Friday the 13th, but then I saw the price of my medications. Now that’s terrifying.
3. My doctor told me to avoid stress on Friday the 13th. So, I’m skipping the bingo tournament. And the early bird buffet. And probably the news.
4. They say if a black cat crosses your path on Friday the 13th, it’s bad luck. But let’s be honest, at my age, bending down to shoo it away is the real hazard.
5. Back in my day, we didn’t need a specific date to be superstitious. Every day felt like Friday the 13th after a bowl of my mother-in-law’s cooking.
6. I used to think walking under a ladder on Friday the 13th was bad luck. Now I realize it’s just poor balance.
7. The good news is I’m not afraid of Friday the 13th anymore. The bad news is, I can’t remember why I was ever afraid in the first place.
8. You know you’re old when you look forward to Friday the 13th because the grocery store is less crowded.
9. Remember when Friday the 13th used to be about Jason Voorhees? Now it’s just another reason my internet bill goes up.
10. Friday the 13th? Bah! I lived through disco. Now THAT was scary.

Friday The 13th Puns and Jokes for Reddit & Other Social Media: Share If You Dare

1. Just booked a cabin in the woods for Friday the 13th… Gonna watch all the “Friday the 13th” movies. What could go wrong? #askingforafriend
2. My superstitions are very reasonable, thank you very much. For example, I never walk under ladders on Friday the 13th… while carrying a mirror… and a black cat. #safetyfirst
3. Breaking News: Local man too superstitious to stay home on Friday the 13th because it’s bad luck to travel. More at 11. #irony #fridaythe13thproblems
4. You know it’s Friday the 13th when… Your coffee pot breaks, your toast burns, and Jason Voorhees is your Uber driver. #sendhelp #almostforgotmyphone
5. How to survive Friday the 13th: Step 1: Stay indoors. Step 2: Avoid all mirrors. Step 3: Don’t answer the phone if it rings 13 times. Step 4: Realize it’s all just a bunch of hocus pocus and order pizza. #youdoyou
6. What’s the difference between a regular Friday and Friday the 13th? On a regular Friday, your plans might go wrong. On Friday the 13th, they go hilariously, meme-worthily wrong. #expecttheunexpected #fridayvibes
7. “I’m not afraid of Friday the 13th,” I said bravely. Then I tripped over a black cat, spilled salt everywhere, and walked under a ladder. #jinxed #itwasboundtohappen
8. Friday the 13th is basically the “Black Friday” of bad luck. Everything’s on sale, but you don’t want any of it. #dealsofdoom #sorrynotsorry
9. My Friday the 13th lucky charm is a horseshoe… dipped in garlic… and holy water… and wrapped in a four-leaf clover… just to be safe. #cantbetakeanychances
10. If you see me running frantically on Friday the 13th, don’t judge. I’m just trying to outrun the bad luck. #gottastayaheadofthegame #cardioday
11. What’s Jason Voorhees’s favorite day to go grocery shopping? Friday the 13th! Everything’s 50% off for customers wearing hockey masks. #retailtherapy #helikeshisprivacy
12. Me trying to explain to my cat that it’s Friday the 13th and he should be extra cautious today: shows cat a calendar, cat yawns and pushes it off the table #theyneverlisten #felineoverlords

Knock-Knock Jokes about Friday The 13th: Because Who’s There? Could be Scary Good Fun

1. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Friday The. > Friday The who? > Friday The 13th! BOO! Did I scare ya?
2. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Friday. > Friday who? > Friday who? Friday me, I forgot to bring my lucky rabbit’s foot!
3. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Black. > Black who? > Black cat crossed my path, so I had to take the long way around to get to your door on Friday the 13th!
4. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Ladder. > Ladder who? > Ladder be Friday the 13th, wouldn’t want to walk under you!
5. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Mirror. > Mirror who? > Mirror, mirror on the wall, isn’t it bad luck to break you on Friday the 13th at all?
6. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Broken. > Broken who? > Broken mirror on Friday the 13th… darn it! That’s seven years bad luck!
7. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Howl. > Howl who? > Howl you like to get stuck in a werewolf traffic jam on Friday the 13th?
8. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Camping. > Camping who? > Camping out at home tonight! Wouldn’t want to run into Jason on Friday the 13th!
9. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Wanna. > Wanna who? > Wanna go to the movies? It’s Friday the 13th, so they’re probably empty!
10. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Scaredy. > Scaredy who? > Scaredy-cat! Don’t let Friday the 13th spook ya!
11. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Bad. > Bad Who? > Bad hair day? Must be Friday the 13th!
12. Knock, knock. > Who’s there? Step. > Step who? > Step aside! I don’t want any bad luck from you on this Friday the 13th!

Don’t Fear the 13th, Laugh at it (and Share!)

Well, there you have it! 95+ reasons why Friday the 13th can be absolutely hilarious. Don’t let triskaidekaphobia get you down – keep on laughing and explore our website for even more pun-derful jokes!

Ahmad Raza

I’m Ahmad Raza, the pun-derful maestro behind PunnyPeak.com! As the chief architect of hilarity, I’m on a mission to spread joy, one pun at a time. Crafting jokes that tickle your funny bone is my forte, and PunnyPeak.com is the whimsical wonderland where laughter reigns supreme. Get ready for a rib-tickling adventure as we explore the crevices of humor – PunnyPeak style! Find My Best Puns.

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