Welcome to Tuesday, the second day of the week! After the Monday blues, it’s time to add some humor to your day with our list of the best Tuesday jokes and puns. These clever and positive jokes are perfect for kids (and adults who refuse to grow up). From groan-worthy puns to hilarious one-liners, get ready to have a good chuckle. So sit back, relax, and get ready to start your day with a sense of humor because who said Tuesdays had to be boring? Let’s dive into our Tuesday jokes and puns, shall we?
Tickle Your Funny Bone: Tuesday Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Top Picks!
- Why did the Tuesday cross the road? To get to the “funny” side!
- What do you call a duck that only quacks on Tuesdays? Aquackday!
- Why don’t trees like Tuesdays? Because it’s their least “poplar” day of the week.
- How does a Tuesday get its caffeine fix? By “brewing” it.
- When is a Tuesday not a Tuesday? When it’s a “Funnies-day!”
- What did the strawberry say on Tuesday? “I’m jam-packed with jokes!”
- How can you tell when it’s Tuesday? When the days start to blend together, and you can’t “Tues”-day from “Wednes”-day.
- How do you make a Tuesday more exciting? Add a little “Fri” to the end.
- Why was Tuesday’s math test so difficult? The teacher made it “tues-quing.”
- What did the calendar say to Tuesday? “You’re just one day closer to Friday!”
- How do you make a Tuesday fly by? Give it some “wings” (and by wings, we mean caffeine).
- What did Tuesday say to Monday? “Glad it’s not me you dread anymore!”
- Why is Tuesday the coolest day of the week? Because it’s the only day that starts with “t” which also ends in “cool.”
- How did Tuesday win the race? With a little “tues-magination.”
- What do you call a riddle-loving Tuesday? A “puz-tues”-day.
- Why did the coffee snub Tuesdays? Because it’s just not their “cup-of-tea” (or cup of coffee, for that matter).
- What do you get when you combine a Tuesday and a Thursday? “Tues-da-thur” – a super long day.
- Why did the computer love Tuesdays? Because it was always ready for a good “Tues-ting.”
- How do you make a Tuesday really special? Throw in some extra “puns” and surprises.
- Why did the chicken cross the road on a Tuesday? To get to the tail-end of the chicken jokes!
Tickle Your Funny Bone with These Hilarious ‘Tuesday’ One-Liner Jokes
- Why was the math book sad on Tuesday? Because it had too many problems.
- Tuesday is just Monday’s ugly sister.
- What do you call a Tuesday that acts like a Wednesday? Tuesday-wednesday.
- Tuesday is the only day you can trade in your problems for tacos.
- I’m not a morning person on any day that ends in “Y”, especially Tuesday.
- Why did the chicken cross the road on Tuesday? To get to the “other side” deals at the grocery store.
- Tuesdays are just like Fridays… except they’re still two days away.
- I tried to make a joke about Tuesday, but it’s not humerus.
- I’m not lazy, I’m just conserving energy for Tuesdays.
- Tuesday is like a twisted version of Christmas, you get a week instead of presents.
- I’m not saying I hate Tuesdays, but if I had a choice between Tuesday and a dentist appointment, I’d choose the root canal.
- Who needs a flex day when you have Taco Tuesday?
- Tuesday is when I decide to start exercising…next week.
- Tuesday: the day of the week where you can count on both coffee and wine to get you through.
- You know you’re getting old when you start appreciating Tuesdays because they’re not as hectic as Mondays.
- I hate Mondays on a whole ‘nother level…called Tuesdays.
- Tuesday is like that awkward middle child between Monday and Wednesday.
- Tuesday: the day of the week where you question your life choices and consider becoming an astronaut.
- Why did the tomato turn red on Tuesday? Because it saw the salad dressing.
- I wish every day was Taco Tuesday, because then I wouldn’t have to come up with dinner ideas.
Tickle Your Funny Bone with These QnA Jokes & Puns about Tuesday!
- Why did the tomato turn red on Tuesday? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- What do you call a fake noodle? An impasta, but only on Tuesdays.
- Why did the duck go to the Tuesday sale? Because he wanted to get a good quack!
- What can you catch but not throw on a Tuesday? A cold.
- What did the calendar say when it was feeling depressed on a Tuesday? I’m feeling dated.
- Why did the banana go out with the prune on Tuesday? Because it couldn’t get a date.
- What has four wheels and flies? A garbage truck, especially on Tuesdays.
- Why did the cookie go to the doctor on Tuesday? Because it was feeling crumbly!
- What do you get when you cross a snowman and a vampire on Tuesday? Frostbite.
- Why did the chicken go to the seance on Tuesday? To get to the other side.
- What do you call a belt made out of watches on Tuesday? A waist of time!
- Why was the math book sad on Tuesday? Because it had too many problems.
- What do you call a bear with no teeth on Tuesday? A gummy bear.
- Why did the skeleton go to the party alone on Tuesday? Because he had nobody to dance with.
- What did one ocean say to the other on Tuesday? Nothing, they just waved.
- Why did the musician have to leave the orchestra on Tuesday? He couldn’t Handel the pressure.
- What did the grape say when it got stepped on on Tuesday? Nothing, it just let out a little wine.
- Why did the belt get arrested on Tuesday? It held up a pair of pants.
- What type of shoes do frogs wear on Tuesday? Open toad sandals.
- Why did the vegetable go to therapy on Tuesday? Because it was feeling beet.
Tickle Your Funny Bone: Dad Jokes about Tuesday
- Why did the calendar go to therapy? Because it had a case of the Tuesday Blues.
- What do you call a cheese that’s not yours? Nacho cheese…but only on Taco Tuesday.
- Why did the scarecrow win an award? Because he was outstanding in his field…on a Tuesday.
- Why did the coffee file a police report? It got mugged on a Tuesday morning.
- What do you call a singing lizard? A croc-a-doodle-doo…on a Tuesday, of course.
- Why did the math book look sad? Because it had too many problems…on a Tuesday.
- What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investigator…on a Tuesday.
- Why did the skeleton start a band? Because he had a lot of bone-us tracks…on a Tuesday.
- What’s the best day for plants? Saturdaisy…but only on Tuesday.
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing…on a Tuesday.
- Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up by itself? Because it was two-tired…on a Tuesday.
- What do you call an alligator in a vest? An investi-gator…on a Tuesday.
- Why did the cookie go to the doctor? Because it was feeling crumbly…on a Tuesday.
- What did the fish say when it hit the wall? Dam! But only on a Tuesday.
- How do you know if a joke is a dad joke? The punchline is apparent…on a Tuesday.
- Why couldn’t Spiderman solve his math problem? Because he couldn’t find his web calculator…on a Tuesday.
- What’s the best day to tell a joke? Punchline-day…on a Tuesday.
- Why did the tomato turn red? Because it saw the salad dressing…on a Tuesday.
- What do you call a belt made out of watches? A waist of time…on a Tuesday.
- Why did the banana go to the doctor? Because it wasn’t peeling well…on a Tuesday.
Tickle Your Funny Bone with these Terrific Tuesday Puns & Jokes for Kids
- Why did the chicken go to therapy on Tuesday? Because it had a case of “chick-aches!”
- What did the Tuesday say to the other days of the week? “Don’t worry, Friday will come before you know it!”
- How do you make a tissue dance on Tuesday? Put a little boogie in it!
- Why did the tomato turn red on Tuesday? Because it saw the salad dressing!
- What did one raindrop say to the other on a Tuesday? “Let’s make a splash together!”
- Why was the math book sad on Tuesday? It had too many problems!
- What kind of shoes do frogs wear on Tuesdays? Open-toad sandals!
- What’s orange and sounds like a parrot on Tuesday? Carrot on!
- Why is Tuesday called the “In-Between” day? Because it’s neither the beginning nor the end of the week!
- What did the bee say to the flower on Tuesday? “Hi, honey!”
- How do you know when a joke is a “dad joke”? When the punchline is a parent!
- Why did the scarecrow win an award on Tuesday? It was outstanding in its field!
- What did the stamp say to the envelope on Tuesday? “I’ve got you covered!”
- How do you fix a broken pizza on Tuesday? With tomato paste!
- Why did the banana go to the doctor on Tuesday? It wasn’t peeling well!
- What did one book say to the other on Tuesday? “I’ve got a great story-line!”
- How do you make a Tuesday more exciting? Add an “S” in front of it!
- What did the avocado say to the cheese on Tuesday? “Guac and Roll!”
- Why did the computer go to the doctor on Tuesday? Because it had a virus!
- What did the chicken say when it crossed the road on Tuesday? “I’m just trying to get to the other side!”
Making It Through the ‘Too-Days’: Hilarious Quotes About Tuesday
- “Tuesday: the awkward middle child of the week.”
- “Whoever said money can’t buy happiness clearly never had Taco Tuesday.”
- “I’m convinced Tuesday is just Monday’s evil twin.”
- “Tuesday: the day where you realize it’s not Friday yet.”
- “Is it just me or does Tuesday have a serious case of the Monday’s?”
- “Why does Tuesday feel like the longest day of the week and the weekend’s ex?”
- “Tuesday is like a potato – plain and uneventful, but necessary for the week to function.”
- “Tuesday: when you start counting down the days until Friday, but then realize it’s only Tuesday.”
- “They say Tuesday is the most productive day of the week, but clearly they’ve never met me.”
- “Tuesday: the day where even coffee needs a coffee.”
- “I’m sorry, I can’t hear you over the sound of my Tuesday blues.”
- “Tuesday: the day where I start questioning all of my life choices.”
- “Why do they call it Taco Tuesday when I eat tacos on all seven days of the week?”
- “The only good thing about Tuesdays is that they’re not Mondays.”
- “Tuesday: the day where I’m convinced everyone else got the memo but me.”
- “I never trust people who say they love Tuesdays.”
- “Is it just me or does Tuesday feel like a whole week on its own?”
- “Tuesday is like a Monday with better PR.”
- “Why do we even bother with Tuesdays? Can’t we just skip to Wednesday?”
- “If Tuesdays had a theme song, it would be ‘Stuck in the Middle with You’.”
Tickle your funny bone with these comical proverbs and wise sayings about Tuesday!
- On Tuesday, you can’t have your cake and eat it too, but you can definitely have tacos for breakfast and lunch.
- “A Tuesday without coffee is like a frog without legs – pointless and hopping mad.”
- “Tuesday Tip: If at first you don’t succeed, just blame it on Monday’s leftovers.”
- On Tuesday, the early bird gets the worm, but the late-comer gets a full night’s sleep.
- “Tuesday lunch meetings are like playing Russian roulette – you never know if you’ll get pizza or a 3-hour PowerPoint presentation.”
- “They say ‘Tuesday’s child is full of grace’, but I’m more like Tuesday’s child needs an extra cup of coffee.”
- Tuesday workout: running late for work counts as cardio, right?
- “Tuesday mantra: I can do this, it’s not Monday anymore.”
- “They say ‘Tuesday is the new Monday’, but I say let’s just make it the new Friday!”
- “On a Tuesday, you can either handle your problems like a rubber band or like a balloon filled with needles – your choice.”
- “I don’t trust people who say they love Tuesdays – it just seems fishy to me.”
- “Tuesday motivation: if you survive today, you’re one day closer to Friday!”
- “A Tuesday without tacos is like a circus without the clowns – dull and lacking in entertainment.”
- “Tuesday dilemma: do I wear my Monday clothes again or finally do laundry?”
- “They say ‘good things come to those who wait’, but on Tuesday, I prefer ‘good things come to those who order takeout’.”
- “Tuesday math: 1 hour of work = 1 minute of productivity + 59 minutes of web surfing.”
- “If life gives you lemons, make lemonade. If life gives you Tuesdays, go back to bed.”
- “On Tuesdays, I go through more emotions than a Disney movie marathon.”
- “A Tuesday without deadlines is like a hot dog without a bun – it just doesn’t feel right.”
- “They say ‘a penny saved is a penny earned’, but on Tuesday, a penny saved is a penny spent on a midday snack.”
Tuesdays just got twice as fun with our double entendre puns!
- “Looks like someone’s got a case of the Tuesdays…or is it just gas?”
- “Tuesday is like the middle child of the week…unimportant and forgotten.”
- “I don’t always drink on Tuesdays, but when I do, it’s for Taco Tuesday.”
- “Tuesday just called…it wants its boring reputation back.”
- “On Tuesdays, I prefer my coffee with a side of retail therapy.”
- “Why did the calendar break up with Monday? Because Tuesday was its new hump day.”
- “If Monday is the ex you can’t get rid of, then Tuesday is the rebound that never quite satisfies.”
- “I tried to take a selfie with Tuesday, but it refused to smile.”
- “On Tuesdays, my to-do list just gets longer and my motivation gets shorter.”
- “I don’t trust anyone who likes Tuesdays…they’re probably a villain in disguise.”
- “Why did the chicken cross the road on a Tuesday? To get to the other side…of the week.”
- “Tuesdays are like mini Mondays…but without the hope of a weekend.”
- “Tuesday is just Wednesday’s ugly, forgotten stepchild.”
- “I like to think of Tuesdays as ‘Wanna-be Fridays.'”
- “If Monday is the warm-up, then Tuesday is the main event…of mediocrity.”
- “Tuesday: the day when you realize your weekend was a lie and you still have four more days to go.”
- “Why is Tuesday the most forgettable day of the week? Because it’s just a day that ends in ‘y’.”
- “If Tuesday was a person, it would be that one coworker who always forgets your name.”
- “Tuesday isn’t just a day…it’s a state of mind. And it’s a boring one.”
- “If Tuesday had a theme song, it would be ‘I Got 99 Problems But the Weekend Ain’t One.'”
Tickling Your Funny Bone with Recursive Puns about Tuesday
- Why did the tomato go on a diet every Tuesday? Because it wanted to be a slimmer-cicle!
- I tried to make a joke about Tuesday, but it just kept coming back around.
- I can never keep track of what day it is… I guess you could say I’m a ‘Tues-deziac’.
- Why couldn’t the bicycle stand up on its own? Because it was ‘2-Tues’ and needed some time to rest.
- What did one calendar say to the other on Tuesday? “I’ve got your back, Tuesday buddy.”
- Why was the letter ‘T’ afraid of Tuesdays? Because they always come after Monday!
- Did you hear about the new restaurant that only serves dishes on Tuesdays? It’s called ‘Infinite Tues-tisfaction’.
- What did the potato chip say to the other potato chips on Tuesday? “Let’s make it a ‘Chews-Day’!”
- Why couldn’t the chicken cross the road on Tuesday? Because it was stuck in a ‘Poultry-many’ of puns.
- I got my days mixed up and thought it was Wednesday today… Oops, I guess I was a ‘Day-L8-Tuesday’.
- Why was Tuesday always so popular at school? Because it was the ‘Cool’iday of the week.
- What do you call a holiday that falls on a Tuesday? ‘Two-seday’!
- Why did the skateboard keep falling down on Tuesday? Because it was ‘2-terrific’ to stay still.
- How is Tuesday different from other days? It’s a ‘7-day-2′-week’end’!
- What is a ghost’s favorite day of the week? Boo’s-day, of course!
- Why did the golfer only play on Tuesdays? Because he was a ‘Hole-in-2’ pro!
- What do you call a funny little lizard that only comes out on Tuesdays? A ‘Tues-dilly’!
- Why did the cookie cry on Tuesday? Because it was a ‘Chip-py’ day.
- How did the artist know it was Tuesday? Because he had a ‘7-day-2-sketch-it’.
- What happens when you tell a Tuesday joke to someone who has already heard it? It becomes a ‘Two-peat’!
Tuesday, who? Tuesday the day for silly knock-knock jokes!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Toesday.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Chewsday.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Touche-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Snooze-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Amuse-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Stew-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Few-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Clues-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Blues-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Viewsday.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Choose-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cruise-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Threes-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? News-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Muse-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shoes-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Fuse-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Crews-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Dues-day.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Booze-day.
Tuesday Puns So Good, They’ll Knot You Senseless!
Well folks, it looks like our time together is coming to a close. I don’t know about you, but I’m feeling pun-tastic after reading 180+ jokes and puns about Tuesday. Who would have thought this seemingly ordinary day of the week could hold so much humor? But don’t fret, there are plenty of other related pun and joke posts waiting for you to discover. So go forth, my fellow jokesters, and spread the joy of Tuesday with your witty one-liners. Remember, every day is a good day for a good laugh!