Welcome, humor-loving readers! Are you ready to journey into a world filled with laughs and clever wordplay? Look no further, because I’ve got the best list of puns about Lord of The Rings that will have you rolling on the floor with laughter. These jokes are perfect for kids and adults alike who love all things Tolkien. So get ready to sharpen your wit and join me on this hilarious adventure through Middle Earth. Trust me, these puns are precious.
Ring in the Laughs: Lord of the Rings Puns & Jokes – Editor’s Picks
- What did Legolas say when Frodo asked for help? “Don’t worry, I’ve got your back-ah!”
- Why did Bilbo take a nap during the battle of Helm’s Deep? He was fighting a Balrog-nar!
- What do you call a Hobbit who loves to party? Frodo the Fun-loving!
- Why did Aragorn’s sword turn bright blue? He was going through a Strider phase!
- What did the orcs say when they found the One Ring? “My preciousssss!”
- How do you make Pippin laugh? Tell him a Merry joke!
- What’s the hardest part about being a ring bearer? Dealing with all the precious weight!
- What did Sauron say when his army was defeated? “Well, that’s Saur-on you!”
- Why did Gandalf take up smoking? He wanted to become Gandalf the Grey Ash!
- How did Gollum become so good at riddles? He had a lot of time to riddle things out in the cave!
- What’s the most dangerous place in Middle Earth? The Map-o-Mordor!
- Why did Pippin sneak into Fangorn Forest? He heard there were tree-pendous parties there!
- What did Merry say when he saw Sam’s cooking skills? “That’s Sam-good cooking!”
- Why did Boromir bring his horn to Rivendell? He wanted to play a little Boromi-music!
- How does Legolas keep his hair so shiny? He uses elf-a-shampoo!
- What does an Ent wear to a fancy party? A Tree-uxedo!
- Why did Gandalf join a band of merry thieves? He wanted to be known as the Grey Rob-bur!
- How did Saruman learn magic? He went to Wiz-ard school!
- What’s Gollum’s favorite musical genre? Rock and preciousss!
- Why did the Eagles refuse to take the Fellowship to Mordor? They didn’t want to get caught up in the Frodo-ring toss!
Brace Yourselves for these Hilarious ‘Lord Of The Rings’ One-Liner Jokes!
- “Why did Sauron quit his job as a jeweler? He wanted more ring-pendence.”
- “Gandalf is so old, he remembers when the Middle Earth was just called ‘Earth’.”
- “How does one defeat a Balrog? With a fiery determination.”
- “Why did Legolas run out of arrows during the battle? He was trying to keep up with the Fe-llowship.”
- “What kind of elf is an expert on plants? A wise shrub-elf.”
- “Did you hear about the hobbit who went on a diet? He said ‘Farewell, breakfast’.
- “Why did Frodo get a job at the post office? He wanted to deliver the One Ring.”
- “What did Gollum say when he lost The Precious? I can’t believe I just threw it away!”
- “Why was Boromir always volunteering for dangerous missions? He had a lot of deci-swords.”
- “What do you call an orc who can bake? A cookie-monster.”
- “Why did the elf refuse to pay for his drinks? He said they were a little too ‘price Legolasy’.”
- “What do you call an Ent who is always late? A tree-beard.”
- “Why did Bilbo hire an interior designer for his hobbit hole? He wanted it to be ‘Bag-end’.”
- “Why did Aragorn miss his concert? He forgot to tune his stringed instrument.”
- “What did the man say when asked what he wanted to eat at the Shire’s feast? ‘More Hobbit-form. I’m starving.'”
- “Why did the dwarf open a bakery in Middle Earth? He loved making gems-muffins.”
- “What do you call a hobbit who is also a magician? A Gandalfing hobbit.”
- “Why did the orcs start a heavy metal band? They wanted to rock the Mordor’s world.”
- “What did the ghost of Saruman say when he met the ghost of Gandalf? ‘You shall not pass… through walls.'”
- “Why did Sauron have trouble winning the war? He couldn’t handle the eye strain from staring into the palantir all day.”
Unleash Your Inner Hobbit with These QnA Jokes & Puns about ‘Lord Of The Rings’
- Q: Why did Sauron always lose in battles? A: Because he had no Faramir in his army!
- Q: What did Gandalf say when he entered the Mines of Moria? A: “Moria problems, am I right?”
- Q: Why did Frodo bring Merry and Pippin on his journey? A: Because he needed a couple of hobbits on the side.
- Q: How many elves does it take to change a light bulb? A: None, they’ll just keep living in the darkness and sing about it.
- Q: What does Aragorn use to keep his sword in place? A: A LOthering Ring.
- Q: Why did the Nazgul cross the road? A: To get to the other Rings.
- Q: What’s Gollum’s favorite type of music? A: “Precious metal”, of course.
- Q: How does Legolas stay fit and agile? A: He’s a bow-flexer.
- Q: What did the Ent say when he chopped a tree? A: “I’m sorry, I didn’t mean to be sappy.”
- Q: What did Treebeard say when he saw a young hobbit? A: “Well, well, well… look who’s a Hobbit-in-training!”
- Q: What’s the most popular drink in Middle Earth? A: Barliman’s Best Beer.
- Q: Why is Sam always helpful and optimistic? A: Because he’s a glass-half-Frodo kind of guy.
- Q: Why did Saruman join the dark side? A: He just couldn’t resist the temptation of having a Saran wrap around his finger.
- Q: What did the Balrog say when he fell into the abyss? A: “This is such a Gollum moment.”
- Q: Why did the hobbit go to the bar? A: He was feeling dwarfed.
- Q: How does Sauron keep his helmet so shiny? A: With Olog-Hai-lay polish!
- Q: Why does Aragorn never lose his way? A: Because he’s got his GPS (Gandalf’s Precious Scroll).
- Q: What happened when a hobbit entered Mordor? A: He found himself in a real Yollum-Yollum situation.
- Q: What did the ring say to Frodo on their first meeting? A: “Hey, I like your precious finger.”
- Q: What’s Gondor’s favorite social media platform? A: Minas-tagram.
Bringing the ‘Precious’ Laughs: Dad Jokes about Lord of the Rings
- Why did Sauron refuse to go on a date? Because he was already too attached to his Ring.
- What do you call a group of hobbits doing yoga? Lord of the Rings-a-roses.
- Why did Frodo always have trouble picking up women? Because he was always just a little too ring-focused.
- How many elves does it take to change a lightbulb? None, because they prefer to live in the twilight.
- What did Gandalf say to the waiter when he brought him the wrong order? “You shall not pass the salt, but I will take some extra fries.”
- Why was Smeagol always so good at gymnastics? Because he was a master of the rings.
- What do you call a group of orcs playing music? A heavy metal band, obviously.
- Why did Saruman switch to a vegan diet? Because he couldn’t handle the one ring to Rule them all thing.
- Why did Legolas and Gimli start their own bakery? Because they were tired of all the ring jokes and wanted to focus on doughnuts instead.
- What’s Bilbo’s favorite type of music? Hobbit-hop.
- Why couldn’t the fellowship cross the river on their own? Because they were all lacking in ferry-Go-rounds.
- How does Sauron like his eggs? Scrambled in the fires of Mount Doom.
- What do you get when you mix Gollum with a cookie? My precious snack.
- How many dwarves can fit in a hobbit hole? As many as you can squeeze in, it’s like a tiny clown car.
- Why did Elrond have terrible teeth? Because he always refused to brush them, claiming it was a pointless endeavor in Middle Earth.
- What do you call a hobbit who likes to steal things? A sneak thiefling.
- Why is Sam the bravest hobbit? Because he’s the only one who dared to ask, “What’s for second breakfast?”
- How do you get to Mount Doom from the Shire? Through Mordor and take a Frodo-less road.
- Why did Pippin and Merry decide to become bakers? Because they heard there was always a second break loaf.
- What did the ent say when he didn’t know the answer to a question? “Treebeard me to it!”
Get Your ‘Precious’ Giggles with These ‘LORD of the Rings’ Puns & Jokes for Kids!
- What do you call an elf that’s always on time? A hobbit!
- Why did the Uruk-hai refuse to read a book? Because he couldn’t handle the Tolkien!
- What did Gandalf say when he got stuck in the rain? “I’m having a wizard of a time!”
- What do you get when you mix Frodo and Gollum? Fro-dium!
- How did Samwise Gamgee solve the math problem? By using his elf-closure method!
- What type of coffee does Legolas like? E-lvish roast!
- How did Aragorn fix his broken sword? He called his friend, Glue-druil!
- What do you call it when Treebeard throws a temper tantrum? An ent-rage!
- What do you get when you cross a wizard and a tree? A spell-oak-tor!
- Why couldn’t the Nazgul get a date? Because they’re ring-wraiths!
- What do you call it when Legolas gets a boo-boo? An El-vision!
- How does Saruman style his hair? With wizard gel!
- What did Frodo say when he lost the ring? “I guess I’ll just have to find it by hook or by crook!”
- Why did Bilbo throw a party for his friends? Because he don’t need no Riddle!
- What do you get when you mix Gimli with a mermaid? A dwarf-phin!
- How did Sauron communicate with his minions? Through his evil cell-urak-hai!
- What did Arwen say when she saw Aragorn’s new suit of armor? “You look Aragorn-gant!”
- Why did Frodo have trouble walking after the ring was destroyed? Because he had Mordor feet!
- What’s Gollum’s favorite type of bread? Ring-o-rolls!
- Why did Legolas refuse to use a bow and arrow while riding a horse? Because he didn’t want to be a horse-bow rider!
Get Your ‘Precious’ Dose of Laughter with these Funny Quotes about Lord of the Rings!
- “Gandalf may be a wizard, but I’m pretty sure he uses his staff to reach snacks on high shelves.”
- “I used to have a job at a Hobbit bakery, but I couldn’t handle the pressure of second breakfast.”
- “You know what they say: one ring to rule them all, one gym membership to lose them all.”
- “I always thought Mordor was just a metaphor for Mondays.”
- “I guess the Eagles couldn’t make it to the Super Bowl, they were too busy flying Frodo to Mount Doom.”
- “I bet Sauron’s eye is just red from all the screen time.”
- “Why walk to destroy the ring when you could just use Uber?”
- “Legolas may be an elf, but his hair game is definitely from this century.”
- “If I had a dollar for every time someone said ‘you shall not pass’ to me, I’d have enough money to give up this quest and retire in the Shire.”
- “I always knew there was something shady about those Ents, they’re made of trees for Pete’s sake!”
- “I think Gollum just needs a good therapist, not a precious ring.”
- “In the land of Mordor, the fashion choices are just as dark and gloomy.”
- “Aragorn may be the rightful heir to the throne, but let’s be real, Legolas has better hair.”
- “The only thing more powerful than the ring? Aragorn’s smoldering gaze.”
- “I tried going on a hike in New Zealand, but all I found was sheep, not hobbits.”
- “Samwise Gamgee: the ultimate friend zoned hero.”
- “The only thing more epic than the final battle at Minas Tirith? My morning battle with snooze.”
- “You know what would have made the quest to destroy the ring easier? A GPS.”
- “Frodo may be the ring bearer, but Sam is definitely the real MVP.”
- “I bet the One Ring is just a really fancy mood ring.”
Jokes and Truths: Hilarious Proverbs & Wise Sayings from ‘Lord Of The Rings’
- “One sack of lembas bread is worth ten barrels of miruvor.”
- “A wizard always arrives precisely when he means to…unless he’s stuck in traffic.”
- “One does not simply walk into Mordor…unless they’re wearing comfortable shoes.”
- “Not all that glitters is gold, but it might just be a hobbit’s pipe.”
- “It’s not the size of the staff, it’s how you use it in battle.”
- “Better to be a fool with a ring, than a wise man without one.”
- “Keep your enemies close, but your ring closer.”
- “Elvish hair care techniques: shampoo, rinse, go on an epic quest.”
- “A dwarf’s beard is like a map, never trust someone who can’t read it.”
- “Hobbits: the real reason for the saying ‘size doesn’t matter’.”
- “A Balrog in the hand is worth two in the mines of Moria.”
- “Rumors spread faster than the Ring’s corrupting influence.”
- “Sauron may have been the Dark Lord, but Saruman was definitely the shady neighbor.”
- “If at first you don’t succeed, try riding a giant eagle into battle.”
- “Aragorn may be the king, but Legolas is the real prince charming.”
- “The only thing stronger than Gandalf’s magic is his need for second breakfast.”
- “One does not simply walk into the Prancing Pony without ordering a drink.”
- “Behind every great Ring-bearer, there’s a Hobbit with a frying pan.”
- “There’s no shame in running from a giant cave troll…or a spider…or an army of orcs.”
- “The fellowship that snacks together, stays together.”
Rule Them All with These Hilarious ‘Lord of the Rings’ Double Entendres Puns
- “Looks like Frodo and Sam’s journey had a lot of ‘ring’-ins.”
- “Aragorn might be the King, but Legolas definitely has the ‘elven’ charm.”
- “Gandalf’s staff is not the only thing that’s ‘magical’ about him.”
- “Bilbo sure knows how to ‘smoke’ out a good adventure.”
- “Gollum truly has a ‘split’ personality.”
- “Merry and Pippin are definitely the life of the ‘party tree’.”
- “Gimli and Legolas really forged a ‘dwarf-tastic’ friendship.”
- “Saruman might have a ‘wizard’ title, but he’s no match for Gandalf.”
- “Eowyn proves that girls can also be ‘shield-maidens’.”
- “Gollum’s obsession with the ‘precious’ is just ‘ring’-sane.”
- “Looks like Smeagol is just ‘gollumming’ along with Gollum.”
- “Boromir might have fallen for the ‘one ring’, but his ‘brotherly’ love for Faramir never wavered.”
- “Even Ents couldn’t handle Pippin’s constant ‘tree’-ting them like garbage.”
- “Frodo’s quest to destroy the ‘one ring’ was truly a ‘mountainous’ task.”
- “Legolas and Gimli’s ‘bow’-mance is definitely the stuff of legends.”
- “Gandalf might have fought a Balrog, but he still couldn’t avoid getting his ‘cap’ burned off.”
- “Merry and Pippin’s ‘tree’-nomous adventures would make even Tom Bombadil jealous.”
- “Bilbo and Smaug’s conversations were filled with ‘gold’-en opportunities for puns.”
- “Aragorn’s ‘sword’ skills are definitely something to be reckoned with.”
- “Looks like the ‘fellow’-ship saved Middle Earth from a ‘meltdown’.”
Relish in Rings and Riddles: Recursive Puns about Lord of the Rings
- What do you call a hobbit who loves to travel? Bilbo Baggins Bagging Bags.
- Why did the wizard refuse to go on extended trips? Because he didn’t want to risk Gandalf Away.
- What did the elf say when he got lost in the forest? Legolas, I Need-a-Map!
- What do you call a hobbit who’s been on a diet? Frodo, the Slim and Trim Ringbearer.
- How do you make a Balrog laugh? Tell him a good Gandalf Joke.
- Why did Frodo take a nap in Mordor? Because he wanted to Mount Doom’ze-off.
- What did the hobbit say when he found himself in the wrong movie? I guess I took a Wrong Turn at Middle-earth!
- Why did the ring choose Gollum? Because he was the Lord of the Bling.
- How did the elves build their villages so quickly? They used Legolas of Station Bricks.
- Why was Merry so good at telling stories? Because he had a great Fellowship of the Ring-a-tale.
- What did Treebeard say to the Ents? Let’s Talk about the Root of the Problem.
- Why did the ring want to be destroyed so badly? Because it was looking for a Hot, Mordor-burning Des-troyer.
- How did Sam feel when Frodo left him behind? He was quite Pippin Sad.
- Why did the dwarves always carry axes? Just in case they needed to Gimli-self out of trouble.
- What do you call an orc who’s really into music? An Orchestral Warrior.
- Where did Aragorn get his fashion sense from? From Elrond of the Rings.
- How does Sauron keep himself busy when he’s not conquering Middle-earth? He likes to Eye-brows Landscaping.
- Why didn’t the hobbits like to ride horses? Because they were afraid of getting Too-Ho-bbit.
- What do you get when you cross a hobbit with a dragon? A Fired-up Baggins.
- How did the fellowship celebrate after their victory? They had a Sauron the Rock Party!
Knock, knock. Who’s there? The Fellowship of the Laugh: Knock-knock jokes about Lord of the Rings!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Strider. Strider who? Striderliciously excited to go on an adventure with you!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gandalf. Gandalf who? Gandalf, the Grey Wizard who has important advice for you.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bilbo. Bilbo who? Bilbo-go on an unexpected journey with me!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sam. Sam who? Sam ready for an epic quest!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Legolas. Legolas who? Legolas be friends and fight battles together!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Frodo. Frodo who? Frodo-bly the bravest hobbit in all of Middle Earth.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Aragorn. Aragorn who? Aragornuff of these knock-knock jokes, let’s defeat Sauron!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Gollum. Gollum who? Gollum-one else wants to play with me…
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Orc. Orc who? Orc you glad you’re on the winning side?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Smaug. Smaug who? Smaug I see you, but you can’t see me.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Merry. Merry who? Merry Christmas! I mean, Merry Brandybuck!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pippin. Pippin who? Pippin hot tea for our journey.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Ent. Ent who? Ent you glad we have a reliable tree army?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Minas. Minas who? Minas always been my dream to save Middle Earth.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Theoden. Theoden who? Theoden things are getting intense, let’s saddle up and ride!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Rivendell. Rivendell who? Rivendell me all about your adventures.
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Balrog. Balrog who? Balrog-n’t stand a chance against us!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Eowyn. Eowyn who? Eowyn the Valarion knight, who are you?
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? Shelob. Shelob who? Shelob of this game, it’s time to defeat Sauron!
- Knock, knock. Who’s there? The One Ring. The One Ring who? The One Ring to rule them all, but you can also use it as a doorbell.
The One Ring to Rule All Punderkind
Well, my dear Hobbits and Wizards, it looks like we’ve reached the end of our pun-tastic journey through the lands of Middle Earth. But fear not, for the fun doesn’t have to end here! Make sure to check out our other hilarious posts about all things Lord of the Rings, and who knows, you might just find yourself laughing all the way to Mordor. Keep calm and pun on, my precious pun-lovers!
