Expecting Laughter: 170+ Hilarious Pregnancy Jokes and Puns

Welcome to our list of the best pregnancy jokes and puns! Pregnancy is a wonderful and miraculous journey, but let’s be real- it also comes with its fair share of challenges and awkward moments. That’s where humor and clever wordplay come in to save the day! We have compiled a list of funny and positive jokes that will have both kids and adults laughing. So get ready to put a smile on your face with these puns about pregnancy. Trust us, they’re not just for the expecting moms, but for anyone who appreciates a good dose of humor. Let’s dive right in!

Pregnancy Puns & Jokes That’ll Have You LOLing: Editor’s Top Picks

1. “I’ve been experiencing some contractions, but I keep telling myself to relax-tion.”
2. “I can’t help but feel like a bloated balloon with this baby bump.”
3. “Pregnancy cravings? More like pickles and ice cream mixed with tears and laughter.”
4. “I’m popping out babies like I’m the human version of a Pez dispenser.”
5. “I never thought I’d be taking a nap at my own baby shower, but here we are.”
6. “Being pregnant is like being a superhero, but instead of a cape, I have a belly.”
7. “I may have a bun in the oven, but I still have room for pizza.”
8. “My doctor told me I’m glowing, but I think it’s just the sweat from carrying this extra weight.”
9. “My husband asked what I wanted for Mother’s Day and I told him I just need a break from being a human incubator.”
10. “The only ‘seafood’ I can stomach these days is fish sticks.”
11. “You know what they say, motherhood is a nine-month-long hangover that just keeps getting worse.”
12. “Who needs a gym membership when you can get a full-body workout just by getting up off the couch?”
13. “I never thought I’d be measuring my life in trimesters, but here we are.”
14. “Morning sickness? More like all-day sickness.”
15. “Whoever said being pregnant is beautiful clearly never experienced a third-trimester waddle.”
16. “The miracle of birth? More like the agony of labor pains.”
17. “The thought of giving birth is terrifying, but at least I have an excuse to eat whatever I want for nine months.”

Laughing for Two: Hilarious ‘Funny Pregnancy’ One-Liner Jokes

1. I’m carrying extra weight around my midsection, but it’s all baby…and tacos.
2. Pregnancy: the nine-month voyage to being a smuggler of a human being.
3. I know I’m pregnant, but I’ll just have one more slice of pizza for two.
4. A fetus is basically a tiny roommate who doesn’t pay rent.
5. I have a new workout routine for expecting moms…it’s called carrying a watermelon.
6. I’m growing a tiny human, what’s your superpower?
7. The only time I don’t mind people touching my belly is when there’s a baby in there.
8. Currently taking suggestions for baby names that rhyme with “comfortable sleep”.
9. Pregnancy cravings are not to be messed with…the last person who did now has a toddler named Dorito.
10. My baby is due in a few months but my back feels like it’s already been nine months.
11. Pregnancy is nature’s way of preparing you for sleepless nights and endless bodily fluids.
12. Pregnancy brain is real…yesterday I spent 10 minutes looking for my phone while using it as a flashlight.
13. The glow of pregnancy is really just sweat and the constant need to pee.
14. My partner is considering a vasectomy after witnessing my labor.
15. People keep asking me if I’m having twins…no, just one giant baby.
16. My belly button is now an outie and I’m convinced there’s a tiny alien living inside.

Expecting hilarity: QnA jokes and puns about pregnancy

1. What did the cannibal do when his pregnant wife asked him to cook her something special? He made her a baby back rib dinner!
2. What do you call a pregnant computer? A motherboard!
3. Why was the pregnant math teacher so popular? Because she had a lot of PIE!
4. What do you call a pregnant jar of peanuts? MotherNuts!
5. What do you call a pregnant insect? An embryo-‘bug’!
6. What is a pregnant cat’s favorite song? “I’m too sexy for my litter”!
7. Why don’t skeletons ever get pregnant? They have a bone to pick with childbirth!
8. What did the pregnant cheese say when it saw its reflection? “Halloumi baby!”
9. How does a mother-to-be keep herself organized? She writes everything down on her bump calendar!
10. What do you call an egg that refuses to hatch? An egg-nostic!
11. Why did the pregnant woman start referring to her stomach as “the office”? Because she was carrying her labor force!
12. What did the father mushroom say to his pregnant wife? “I have a feeling this baby is going to be a fungi!”
13. How do you politely ask if someone is pregnant? “Are you expecting a bundle of joy, or have you just been eating too many donuts?”
14. Why did the pregnant comedian’s jokes always fall flat? She was having contractions while trying to deliver punchlines!
15. What kind of music do pregnant women listen to? Womb-ican!
16. Why couldn’t the pregnant woman use her favorite perfume anymore? It was making her cologne sick!
17. What do you call a pregnant seagull? A seagullve!

Dad Jokes about Pregnancy: When Dad Gets Punny with a Baby Bump

1. Why was the pregnant woman constantly craving ice cream? Because she was getting a little Ben and Jerry!
2. I heard that giving birth is a lot like going to the library. You’re really loud and uncomfortable, but at the end, you get a whole new chapter.
3. What did the pregnant woman say when she stubbed her toe? Feta my feet!
4. Why did the mom-to-be cry when she saw her ultrasound? She realized her baby wouldn’t be able to walk her down the aisle at her wedding because it wasn’t born yet.
5. What’s the difference between a pregnant woman and a soccer player? One’s got a bump on their belly, and the other’s got a bump on their foot!
6. Did you hear about the pregnant vampire? She got a serious craving for baby bats!
7. Why was the pregnant woman banned from the gym? She was caught trying to stuff a watermelon under her shirt to skip out on working out.
8. What did the dad say when he felt the baby kick for the first time? “Looks like someone’s giving me a little kick in the pants!”
9. I tried to make a joke about pregnancy, but it didn’t come out very smoothly. I guess you could say it had a bumpy delivery.
10. Why was the doctor worried when the pregnant woman asked for an epidural? Because her boyfriend was named Eddie, and he was sitting right next to her.
11. How do you know if a pregnant woman is having a boy or a girl? Just wait until the baby shower – they’ll have blue or pink cupcakes to reveal the gender.
12. Knock knock. Who’s there? I’m pregnant. I’m pregnant who? I’m pregnant, who you think?
13. Did you hear about the pregnant woman who fell in love with her doctor? She kept telling him to “Be gentle, I’m expecting!”
14. What did the baby say to the ultrasound? Hey, that’s my face you’re looking at!
15. What’s the hospital’s favorite pizza topping? Epi-pepperoni!
16. Why did the pregnant woman get kicked out of the barbecue? She kept lifting the bun of her burger to check if it was done yet.
17. How many babies does it take to paint a wall? It depends on how fast you can throw them – nine months of pregnancy is a long time to wait for a finished nursery!

Preggo Punchlines: Hilarious ‘Pregnancy’ Puns & Jokes for Kids

1. Q: How does a pregnant lady hold up her pants? A: With a belly-band!
2. Q: What did the baby corn say to the mama corn? A: Where’s my pop-corn?
3. Q: How do you organize a space party? A: You planet.
4. Q: What’s a pregnant woman’s favorite type of music? A: Womb-tunes.
5. Q: Why was the pregnant lady always hungry? A: She was just making sure she had a balanced diet for two!
6. Q: What do you call it when a pregnant woman is carrying a grapefruit? A: Citrus-ception.
7. Q: How do you know when a pregnant lady is about to cry? A: She starts picking out baby names.
8. Q: Why shouldn’t you make deer meat for a pregnant woman? A: It’s not very doe-able.
9. Q: What did the one pregnant pepper say to the other? A: I’m jalapeno business!
10. Q: What do you get when you mix a doctor and a magician? A: A stetho-magician!
11. Q: What’s a pregnant woman’s favorite type of pet? A: A hamster! They both have round bellies.
12. Q: Why did the pregnant lady go on a shopping spree? A: She was just hoping to find some labor-saving devices.
13. Q: Why do pregnant women always carry an umbrella? A: In case there’s a delivery.
14. Q: What do you call it when twins are fighting in the womb? A: Womb-combat.
15. Q: Why did the pregnant lady wear stripes? A: Because she wanted to give her baby the space to move around.
16. Q: Why couldn’t the pregnant woman finish her puzzle? A: She kept missing a piece of the placenta.
17. Q: Why did the pregnant lady have to go to the paint store? A: She was craving a fresh coat.

Expecting a Good Laugh: Funny Quotes about Pregnancy

1. “Pregnancy is the only time when gaining weight is celebrated and morning sickness is considered a rite of passage.”
2. “Being pregnant is like having a tiny alien take over your body for nine months.”
3. “I’m not fat, I’m just growing a human.”
4. “Pregnancy: the ultimate excuse for weird food cravings and excessive napping.”
5. “The only thing that stays consistent during pregnancy is the size of your belly button.”
6. “Being pregnant means constantly forgetting what you went into a room for in the first place.”
7. “Pregnancy brain – when you forget things you just said five seconds ago.”
8. “Pregnancy: the only time when you can feel like a whale and a goddess at the same time.”
9. “Pregnancy is nature’s way of preparing you for sleep deprivation once the baby arrives.”
10. “I’m not glowing, I’m just sweaty from carrying around this extra weight.”
11. “Pregnancy is a nine-month long excuse to eat ice cream every day.”
12. “Sleeping during pregnancy is like trying to get comfortable on a waterbed that is constantly moving.”
13. “Pregnancy is like having a party in your tummy and everyone is invited – especially your bladder.”
14. “I’m not pregnant, I’m just full of joy and also a tiny human.”
15. “Pregnancy: proof that women are truly capable of creating life.”
16. “Being pregnant is the perfect excuse to not suck in your stomach for pictures.”
17. “Pregnancy: nine months of feeling like a superhero with superhuman strength (and superhuman hormones).”

Pregnancy: A time of blooming bellies and bizarre cravings!

1. A pregnant woman is like a ticking time bomb, you never know when she’ll explode with cravings.
2. Being pregnant is like being a superhero, except instead of a cape, you have a baby bump.
3. A pregnant belly is nature’s original fanny pack.
4. They say pregnancy cravings can be bizarre, but I never knew I had an insatiable need for pickles until now.
5. Pregnant women should come with a warning label: “Handle with care – contents may be highly emotional and unpredictable.”
6. Pregnancy is like a nine-month-long staring contest with your belly button.
7. The moment a woman finds out she’s pregnant is like hitting the jackpot on the world’s biggest slot machine.
8. Forget the walking dead, the real zombies are pregnant women in their third trimester.
9. Stretch marks are just reminders of the amazing transformation our bodies go through during pregnancy.
10. A pregnant woman is like a walking amusement park – full of twists, turns, and surprises around every corner.
11. Being pregnant means having the power to grow a human inside of you – talk about superhero abilities.
12. They say pregnancy brain is a real thing, but I’m convinced it’s just nature’s way of preparing us for sleepless nights with a newborn.
13. Pregnancy is like jumping on a trampoline – you never know when you might pee a little.
14. Pregnancy is a delicate balance between glowing radiantly and feeling like a beached whale.
15. Being pregnant is like being an incubator – except instead of a robot baby, you’re growing a tiny human.
16. They say laughter is the best medicine, so bring on the pregnancy jokes (and maybe some Tums too).
17. Pregnancy is the ultimate weightlifting competition – but instead of lifting weights, you’re constantly lifting your growing belly and anything that falls on the floor.

Pregnancy Got You Punning: Double Entendres for Expecting Moms

1. “I’m expecting a little bundle of joy, and I don’t mean a sale at the fabric store.”
2. “My belly button has popped out, but I’m still not ready for the cord to be cut.”
3. “I’ve been eating for two, and it’s getting harder to hide my food baby.”
4. “My morning sickness could rival any roller coaster ride.”
5. “I have a case of preggo brain, but at least I’m growing a genius.”
6. “I never thought I’d be craving pickles and ice cream at the same time, but here we are.”
7. “I’ve traded in my party dresses for stretchy pants and maternity bras.”
8. “My husband jokes that he’s not sure if he’s the father or the delivery guy for all the packages arriving for the baby.”
9. “I can’t wait to meet my little avocado, but I hope it doesn’t come with a side of heartburn.”
10. “I’ve got a bun in the oven, and it’s not even baking season.”
11. “I don’t know what’s causing my mood swings, but I blame the hormones, not my husband.”
12. “I’m starting to understand why elephants have such long gestation periods.”
13. “I may be waddling like a penguin, but I’ll still rock those maternity jeggings.”
14. “It feels like every stranger has a sudden urge to touch my belly, it’s like I have a sign that says ‘free petting zoo.'”
15. “I can’t help but feel like I’m in a never-ending game of ‘Are You My Mother?’ with all the ultrasounds and checkups.”
16. “I never thought I’d be counting down the days until I can trade my maternity jeans for regular ones, but here we are.”
17. “I may be nine months pregnant, but I’ve never been more ready for a marathon than I am for labor.”

Expect to Laugh: Recursive Puns about Pregnancy

1. “Why couldn’t the pregnant woman stop laughing? She had a bun in the oven!”
2. “What did the pregnant avocado say to the baby? ‘You’re going to be a real pit-ch!'”
3. “Why did the pregnant woman go on a diet? She wanted to be a mother without gaining mother weight!”
4. “How does a pregnant woman decorate for Halloween? With a baby pump-kin!”
5. “What do you call a pregnant horse? A galloping baby carriage!”
6. “What’s a pregnant bird’s favorite type of music? Coo-ntry!”
7. “Why did the pregnant woman stop playing cards? She was tired of dealing with a full house!”
8. “What’s a pregnant bee’s favorite type of flower? A baby’s breath!”
9. “How does a pregnant woman become a superhero? She gets a bun in the oven for super powers!”
10. “Why did the pregnant woman join a gym? She wanted to get in labor shape!”
11. “What did the pregnant spider say to her baby? ‘I can’t wait to see you spin a web of your own!'”
12. “Why did the pregnant woman switch to decaf? She didn’t want her baby to be a jitterbug!”
13. “What’s a pregnant astronaut’s favorite food? Comet corn!”
14. “Why did the pregnant woman buy a watermelon? She wanted her baby to have a melon-belly!”
15. “What did the pregnant cow say to her calf? ‘I can’t wait to moo-ve you out!'”
16. “Why did the pregnant woman go fishing? She wanted to catch a bass-tion!”
17. “Who does a pregnant woman call for help? Her labor force!”

Pregnancy Puns: Hilariously Misused Words to Tickle Your ‘Maternal’ Instincts

1. Giving birth to a pickle instead of giving birth to a baby
2. Holding your stomachache instead of holding your stomach
3. Water broke down instead of water broke
4. Getting a contravention instead of getting a contraction
5. Feeling constipated instead of feeling contractions
6. Going into laborious instead of going into labor
7. Diluting instead of dilating
8. Feeling pushy instead of feeling pushy
9. Having a prenatal massage instead of having a prenatal class
10. Eating for two forks instead of eating for two
11. Having a bun in the oven instead of having a baby in the oven
12. Braxton kicks instead of Braxton Hicks
13. Enjoying the cake rather than feeling the kick
14. Waking up with choppy fingers instead of Braxton Hick’s hiccups
15. Being overdue for cake instead of being overdue for delivery
16. Feeling bloated instead of feeling baby kicks
17. Baby blooming instead of baby bump

‘Pregnancy’ Spoonerisms: A Bundle of Foal Joy!

1. “Crowning a baby” instead of “Browning a gravy”
2. “Fetal brain” instead of “Beatle fan”
3. “Maternity robe” instead of “Raternity mobe”
4. “Postpartum depression” instead of “Depostarrum pession”
5. “Morning sickness” instead of “Sorning mickness”
6. “Prenatal vitamins” instead of “Vrenatal pitamins”
7. “Belly bump” instead of “Belly dump”
8. “Pregnancy cravings” instead of “Cregnancy pravings”
9. “Stretch marks” instead of “Metch strarks”
10. “Baby shower” instead of “Shaby bower”
11. “Breast pump” instead of “Preat brump”
12. “Labor pains” instead of “Pabor lains”
13. “Nursery rhyme” instead of “Rursery nime”
14. “Umbilical cord” instead of “Cmbilical uord”
15. “Contractions” instead of “Contratctions”
16. “Cesarean section” instead of “Secerean cestion”
17. “Fetal hiccups” instead of “Hetal ficcups”

Knock, knock. Who’s there? Baby on the way with these pregnancy knock-knock jokes!

1. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Mama. Mama who? Mama-to-be!
2. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Bump. Bump who? Bumping along in my maternity clothes.
3. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Pickle. Pickle who? Pickles and ice cream, the perfect pregnancy craving combo.
4. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Due. Due who? Due any day now!
5. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Sleep. Sleep who? Sorry, pregnant brain, I can’t remember anything.
6. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Stork. Stork who? Stork’s got nothing on this swollen belly.
7. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cravings. Cravings who? Pregnancy cravings are no joke.
8. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Nesting. Nesting who? Nesting like a crazy pregnant lady!
9. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Glow. Glow who? Pregnancy glow? More like pregnancy sweat and exhaustion.
10. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Morning sickness. Morning sickness who? Morning sickness has taken over my life.
11. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Kicks. Kicks who? Kicking my bladder all day long.
12. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Counting. Counting who? Counting down the days until this baby is out!
13. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Cramps. Cramps who? Pregnancy leg cramps, the worst torture ever.
14. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Swollen. Swollen who? Swollen feet, swollen hands, swollen everything.
15. Knock, knock. Who’s there? Back pain. Back pain who? Back pain is my new constant companion.

Bump up the laughs with pregnancy puns!

Well, that’s it folks! We hope you had a pun-derful time reading through our 170+ puns about pregnancy. Whether you’re expecting or just a lover of laughter, these puns are sure to tickle your funny bone. And if you’re still craving more, don’t worry, there are plenty of other related puns and joke posts out there waiting to be discovered. So go ahead and indulge in some more pun-ishment, we won’t judge. Until next time, may your pun game be strong and your pregnancy cravings be satisfied. Cheers!

Ahmad Raza

I’m Ahmad Raza, the pun-derful maestro behind PunnyPeak.com! As the chief architect of hilarity, I’m on a mission to spread joy, one pun at a time. Crafting jokes that tickle your funny bone is my forte, and PunnyPeak.com is the whimsical wonderland where laughter reigns supreme. Get ready for a rib-tickling adventure as we explore the crevices of humor – PunnyPeak style! Find My Best Puns.

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